Moment-to-Moment Optimism

Jackie Monroe presents the Optimism Tip of the Week video

By Dr. Russ

Monday is Dr. Russ Busster Day.  In today’s Bussters, I return to the problem of overcoming those pessimistic moments when we feel so overwhelmed, we seriously consider “giving-up” on optimism and letting the pessimistic “beast within” rule the day, week, or life. 

I have often said that sports provide useful, workable and practical metaphors for living life optimistically in the moment.  Recently, I read Born to Run, by Christopher McDougall.  The book recounts the mind set, life experiences and accomplishments of ultramarathoners who run 50 to 100 mile races up and down mountainsides across rugged, non-paved, terrain.  In particular, it enlightens the reader about the Tarahumara Indians; a reclusive tribe living in the Copper Canyons of Mexico’s Sierra Nevada Mountains.

• “For centuries they have practiced techniques that allow them to run hundreds of miles without rest and chase down anything from a deer to an Olympic marathoner while enjoying every mile of it.” (Born to Run, Inside front cover jacket).

I was active in athletics while growing-up; lettered in three sports--soccer, basketball and baseball--in high school.  I have stayed relatively active throughout my adult life, but I have never thought of myself as a ‘runner;’ have been frequently been heard to say, “in order to run, I need a ball to chase or outrun as I try for 1^st base on an infield grounder.”

So, even the thought of running a few miles or more appears overwhelming to me.  Running a marathon is admirable, but not in my dreams.  In my mind, running a double to quadruple marathon could only be possible on some planet with less gravity pull than earth I, right?  Wrong!   I have now learned about the Tarahumara and a “cult” of US runners who call themselves “ultramarathoners.”

McDougall not only tells a compelling true story in an engaging manner, he also gives a glimpse into the mental motivation that underlies this kind of ultra-experience and accomplishment.  Today, I draw on several key quotes from the book that relate to dealing with those times where one feels completely or nearly-so overwhelmed by life’s negative experiences that lead one to wonder, “Can I keep going?”

• The 18 mile mark in a marathon is commonly referred to as the “wall” every marathoner hits and must somehow fight through to be able to finish.  On a fifty or one hundred mile marathon, there must be several such “walls” of pessimism and potentially debilitating self-doubt.

Here are some tips from the super-athletes who have attempted and overcome the marathon physical and mental difficulties of this extreme form of running.

Dr. Russ Bussters to Busst-Up those Extreme Pessimistic Moments

1. The Tarahumara play a running game that does involve chasing a ball for hours, sometimes days and one hundred miles or more.  It is referred to a metaphor for the “game of life... You never know how hard it will be.  You never know when it will end. You can’t control it. You can only adjust." (p. 41)

• Dr. Russ Buss Key Extreme Tip: We cannot control all the events of life.  No matter how hard we try, negative events will occur and impact us.  We can control the “view of the event” more easily if we focus on how to adjust to the event so we can continue to pursue our goal(s).

2.  “Running a hundred miles wasn’t painless for the Tarahumara, either; they had to face their doubts and silence the little devil on their shoulder who kept whispering excellent reasons in their ear for quitting.” (p. 102)

• Dr. Russ Buss Key Extreme Tip: Even the most skilled “superathlete” has self doubts that come in the form of that negative inner voice that says, “Life could be a lot easier if you just gave it up.” To maintain optimism when this voice rings out, don’t push it away.  Either let the message float like a cloud into and out of awareness, “in one ear and out the other,” or thank the voice for expressing the opinion and say, “I have a better idea upon which I am going to focus.”

3. “. . . the most advanced weapon in the ultrarunner’s arsenal: instead of cringing from fatigue, you embrace it.  You refuse to let it go. You get to know it so well, you’re not afraid of it anymore.”  (p. 124).

• Dr. Russ Buss Key Extreme Tip:  Learn to embrace pessimism as friend, not an enemy, by recalling the old Simon and Garfunkle lyric: “Hello darkness, my old friend.”  When pessimism learns you are not afraid of it, the pessimism diminishes in power allowing for optimism to prevail.

4. View “exhaustion as if it’s a playful pet.”  “ . . love the Beast,” . . . “look forward to the Beast showing up, because every time he does, I handle him better.  I get him more under control.” “. . . have a friendly little tussle with the Beast and show it who’s boss?  You can’t hate the Beast and expect to beat it; the only way to truly conquer something, as every great philosopher and geneticist will tell you, is to love it.” (p. 125).

• Dr. Russ Buss Key Extreme Tip:  Accept the “pessimism beast” as a normal and recurring mindset, much like the event of failure.  Optimism thrives on the opportunity to fail as it is a major opportunity to learn and move ahead toward one’s goals.  So instead of rejecting your moments of pessimism, embrace them, stroke them, and thank them for giving you important information about key obstacles that still need to be overcome.

{Reference: McDougall, C. (2009). Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen. New York: Alfred A. Knopf}

By Dr. Russ,

Radio Optimism

In this rendition of the Dr. Russ Buss week in review, I share my struggle with some high’s and low’s of the week and a bit of lingering "sticky" pessimism.

A little over a week ago, Jackie Monroe and I were interviewed on MIENTERTAINMENT RADIO, a new web based radio station, by Christine Andrew who hosts a weekly radio show called My Health and Wellness.  We spent the better part of an hour discussing our work on optimism at Dr Russ Buss.com.

The program was aired at noon yesterday, June 5, 2010 and again today at 1 PM.  I remember feeling quite elated about the experience of sitting in front of a microphone while sharing responses with Jackie Monroe to Christine’s questions about optimism.

I was not able to listen to the program yesterday, but I did hear the rebroadcast today.  I found myself listening intently to what Jackie and I had to say.  I thought I might be self critical, but instead I found my own sense of optimism returning as the show progressed.

Even Dr. Russ Gets Stuck in Pessimism

Today, I have been having one of those “sticky pessimism” days; trouble staying in the moment; instead thinking about some negatives in past and future.  I can pinpoint the negative feelings associated with the negative thoughts, but I am struggling with why I am stuck on such negative thinking in the first place.

Today, my “Optimism Stamina” isn’t helping me rebound as quickly as usual.

Why am I floundering about in the negative today when yesterday there was so much positivity going on?

I performed in my 7th annual Mark Taylor School of Dance, Tap Dance recital last night and the night before.  I led an American Cancer Society,  “Relay for Life,” “Fight Back” ceremony at noon yesterday that was very well received.  What is the matter Dr. Russ?

Negative Noise

Sometimes we have to look at the background noise that is just barely audible in our thoughts.  In my case the background noise relates to a health issue which I am about to confront head on and hopefully get corrected.

Open Heart Surgery

In a week and two days, I will be having “open heart” surgery at the Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland Ohio to repair my mitral valve.  It is major surgery. I will have a basic 6-8 week recovery time.  Yes. I need it or my heart will go into irreversible Congestive Heart Failure. 

My Own Advice Comes Back to Me

My wife has drawn on her own experience with cancer surgery and told me she had to recognize she did not have control over getting cancer, but did have control over getting treatment and recovering from it.

I thought as I listened to her, wait a minute, that’s the advice I give all the time.  Why can’t I follow my own advice?  I laugh at myself a bit, despite still feeling in a funk.

So, today I had the opportunity to literally listen to myself discuss optimism.   About a quarter of the way into the one hour show, I began to feel less pessimistic; my funk began to lift.

Six Radio Optimism Tips

Here is a synopsis of six of the many optimism topics we covered that helped me to become unstuck from that “sticky pessimism” funk.

1.    Learning to live and stay in the moment to maintain optimism.  Can’t be thinking of past of future negatives if I am focused “in the moment” on what I am doing and the moment to moment thoughts guiding my actions.
2.    No matter how many times I have a negative thought during the day I have a choice about whether to stay with that negative thought; just have to apply tools of “skilled optimism.”
3.    Sometimes we have grumpy days at the office; but we have learned not to spread our grumpiness to others like some flu bug.  As Jackie said, we give the other some space and soon that person makes the choice to leave the grumpiness behind.
4.    Parents can learn to teach their children to:  NOT be fearful, enjoy new experiences, learn from failure, take on challenges, and seek the more difficult tasks.  Children who have confidence they can handle “anything that comes along” have more self confidence, self-worth and live happier, longer and more “successful” lives than children who learn to fear failure and avoid the hard and the new.
5.    Strength to carry on can often be found in one’s religious beliefs and spirituality.  Our faith, whatever it is, can give us the confidence that we can “endure’ whatever problems, difficulties and “curve balls” life has to throw at us in a moment, an hour, a day, week, month or longer.
6.    Expressing Gratitude to one’s “higher spiritual power” for the gift of the strength to get through these time tough times is important for maintaining optimism.

{The entire one hour radio interview will be available on podcast through MIENTERTAINMENT RADIO  in a few days.}

We will post the link so BE ALERT and WATCH for it!



By Dr. Russ,

In this Dr. Russ Buss Week in Review, I share some of my moment-to-moment struggles to maintain my "Optimistic Stamina" frustrated by the gloom and doom of this shortened, nay lengthened, month of February.

The first week of February is over, with 3 more to go.  Despite my own advice to find ways to get through this month with a positive view intact, I am already struggling; fighting off a daily sense of February pessimism – how will I get through this month?

I do have to remind myself that, for me, getting through this first week is usually tougher than I think it should be because it is the anniversary of my father’s death.  After 11 years, the sub-conscious and subjective grief experience still affects my moment-to-moment emotional state.

I said FOCUS on fun, festivals, and football.  Today is the Super Bowl. Am I to believe that memories of the game and the array of “Super Bowl” ads are really going to sustain me until Valentines Day?  I’m not going to be doing anything special on Valentine’s anyway. Mardi Gras might be next, but I am not going to be in New Orleans.  FOCUS isn’t working for me, right now.

Inspirational quotes are wonderful, and I hope you are feeling more inspired by these than I am right at the moment.  “Failure” is not on my mind, but the daily struggle to keep making progress seems like I am walking through a mud bog.

Humph! Mud bog.  The family was sailing the backwaters of the Jersey Shore town, Stone Harbor, there were little inlets, lots of shallow water, and no wind.  We ran aground.

• “Rusty” (my childhood nickname to differentiate me from my Dad for whom I was named) "why don’t you get out and tow the boat?" I stepped into “high ankle” high mud, threw a rope over my shoulder, and began pulling the boat though the shallows; took about an hour before we got back to sailable water.  Not much fun, but we had some laughs and did get home that night.  Is the frustration of maintaining February “optimism” really more challenging than that the “mud bog?”

A high point of the week was sharing my TIP of the WEEK; my struggles with “failure” and attempts to deal with it during the college years.  “Failure;” now there is another word that ought to be eliminated from the dictionary of “optimism.”  I had fun creating the “Wizard of Pessimism” character.  He/she will be back.

If I knew that a couple out there rally read, studied, practiced and used one or more of the “Seven Positive Communication Skills of Highly Effective Couples,” I would have a very “high” moment of “optimism” erasing much of the February pessimism.

I suppose I could keep watching the Down’s Syndrome Grocery Store bagger video over and over, feel teary eyed, and then think that the mission to spread optimism is “worthwhile;” a nice, but temporary feeling. 

I’m beginning to feel a little like our “Struggling Optimist” who took the week off; maybe subconsciously I am trying to reflect the message that maintaining optimism requires “optimistic stamina;” constant work and practice to keep-up and develop the “skill.”




By Dr. Russ

Monday is Dr. Russ Busster Day, the day I offer tips to “Busst-Up” any pessimism facing you this week.  In today’s Bussters I address the PESSIMISM of the WHOLE MONTH OF FEBRUARY.

The “Irony of February:” The month has the fewest days of any, but psychologically seems like the longest month of the year. February is associated with sadness, gloom, ill health, and in the Northern Hemisphere - cold, clouds, and bad weather.  It is the month the Ground Hog often runs back into his hole signaling six more weeks of winter.  Pessimistic – You bet!! And, the “Sticky Kind” for sure.

How can we fight this February Funk?  Like anyone I am subject to getting caught-up in a doom and gloom scenario; can find myself “stuck” looking for some OPTIMISM.  In these situations, I often turn to a little brainstorming technique to help me shed the FUNK.  I take a word directly or indirectly associated with the issue or problem and free associate words and phrases to each letter of the word.  Let’s try the word February.  Here is what I came with:

Eight Dr. Russ Bussters to Busst-Up the February Funkies

F- FOCUS on the available fun and festivals of February including Valentines Day, President’s Day Holiday, the Winter Olympics, college basketball, ice hockey, and even more high school basketball.

E – Learn and re-learn that to “ENDURE” is a worthwhile experience.

B – BELIEVE that Spring is just around the corner; “BLOW” the town and fly south or anywhere for a brief getaway.

R – REPLAY the movie Ground Hog Day over and over, and reflect on the many opportunities you have for “do-overs.”  In this 1993 movie starring Bill Murray in the role of TV weatherman Phil Conners, Conner’s kept reliving February 2 over and over until he finally got life “right.” After multiple “do-overs” he discovered that life was not about trying to fulfill his own needs, but rather about a  quest for continual self-improvement devoted to attending to the needs of others. 

U – UNDERSTAND that this, month of February, too shall pass.   Post up the phrase: “February too shall pass.”  Remember that the ULTIMATE joy of life is personal growth and self-improvement.

A – ACCEPT the “irony” that February is the “psychologically longest” month of the year.  Now, what choices do you have?  Use this analogy.  What advice do you give a family of about to embark on a long distance driving family vacation?  You tell them to take lots of things along to keep everybody busy such as books, games, videos, and other electronic devices.  So – Now what are your choices?

R – RETREAT to your hole and curl up with some good books; REMEMBER beaches aren’t the only place for "summer reading." While in your hole, REFLECT on some self-improvement goals that would benefit others as well as yourself.

Y – Put a sign next to your alarm clock that says, “YES, I CAN!”

FINAL FEBRUARY TIP:  Make your own “free associations” to each letter of the word, “February.” Now, you are truly IN CHARGE of your own “Moment-to-Moment Skilled Optimism.”

Check out the Dr. Russ, "Learning Optimism Blog," on the website: Life in Lansing.